We all know that men's bathrooms aren't the safest place on Earth, especially for trans people. But how do we change this problem without bodyguards, besides the obvious solution of single bathrooms? Here are ten ways, some unexpected, that businesses can show solidarity with trans men and make us safer in the men's bathroom.
1: In-Stall Trash Cans
As a trans man who still has periods, one of the easiest ways to be outed in the men's bathroom is throwing out a pad. Once I even made eye contact with a cis guy while doing it. Fortunately for me, that was at a small and accepting high school in California, but not all of us live in places where it's safe to be openly trans in a public bathroom. Throwing away menstrual products and wrappers in the stall would help minimize the evidence of our transness, therefore making it safer for us to use the men's bathroom during shark week.
2: Not Leaving Giant Spaces Between Stall Walls, or Between the Wall and the Floor
This seems like a pretty obvious one, but not everybody catches on to this trend we call Privacy. I know I feel a lot safer when cis guys aren't able to see my parts when checking to see if the stall is available. Just push on the door, dude.
And if they can't see under the stall as much, it's a lot harder for people to tell whether someone's sitting or standing. So if they hear me peeing, they might assume I'm one of the cis men who refuses to use the urinal. Some cis men sit to pee, too, but it's not that common, and if a trans guy doesn't pass that well to begin with, it's a good indication to anyone who had suspicions.
And if they can't see under the stall as much, it's a lot harder for people to tell whether someone's sitting or standing. So if they hear me peeing, they might assume I'm one of the cis men who refuses to use the urinal. Some cis men sit to pee, too, but it's not that common, and if a trans guy doesn't pass that well to begin with, it's a good indication to anyone who had suspicions.
3: Fixing Broken Locks
Another obvious gift of privacy. When we aren't able to lock stall doors, it makes it a lot easier for cis men to walk in on us, either on purpose or by accident, and see the difference between us and them as well as enter a private space with just the two of us. If that's not a scary thought to you, obviously you've never had a vagina.
4: Urinal Dividers
This seems like it would mostly benefit cis men. While peeing at the urinals, they wouldn't be able to see each other's junk. How does that make the men's bathroom any safer for trans men?
First of all, some trans men stand to pee. Either they've had surgery, in which case they're probably pretty safe using the urinal already, or they have something we call an STP. "Standard temperature and pressure? What does that have to do with urination?" No, in this context, STP stands for "stand to pee," and is commonly used to refer to devices or packers that enable people without penises to do so. They can be useful for cis women as well, if they're too rushed to sit down or are grossed out by public toilet seats--which, let's be honest, who isn't?--but for many trans men, they can also ease dysphoria and help us pass. However, most STPs don't double as packers, and even those that do may not be realistic enough to pass as a real penis.
Second of all, the most dangerous part of using the men's restroom for trans men who don't pass as well is waiting outside the stall. Since many cis men and trans men who use STPs are concerned for their privacy, they tend to use the stalls when there are no urinal dividers. This means that those of us who can't use the urinal are far more likely to have to wait for a stall. Sometimes cis men don't even lock the stall door, leaving us in danger of accidentally walking in on someone. That's a surefire way to catch his attention if I ever saw one!
Second of all, the most dangerous part of using the men's restroom for trans men who don't pass as well is waiting outside the stall. Since many cis men and trans men who use STPs are concerned for their privacy, they tend to use the stalls when there are no urinal dividers. This means that those of us who can't use the urinal are far more likely to have to wait for a stall. Sometimes cis men don't even lock the stall door, leaving us in danger of accidentally walking in on someone. That's a surefire way to catch his attention if I ever saw one!
5: Having More Stalls
Another way to limit our time outside the stall is to have more stalls for us to use. If there are one or two stalls, one cis guy who has to go #2, and two cis guys that have to pee, the trans man who walks in will almost certainly have to wait for a stall. Honestly, I don't know what's with cis guys. They use the stall to pee way more than they should, but if its unavailable, they seem to have no problem using the urinal. It's like a less extreme version of using the handicapped spot until you reach one of the many parking lots designed with only abled customers really in mind. But if you see a guy waiting for a stall rather than just using the urinal, chances are he's trans or doesn't have to pee. When a trans guy goes into the stall and starts peeing, that narrows down the possible reasons and lets everyone know that he's trans. Not great.
